Sunday, November 14

'Blue State Blues... Dollywood Values'

Thank God for wickedly good parody. Here in this region, parody is often - no, make that usually - kicked far back in the shade and rendered impotent by increasingly ludicrous reality. Iowahawk is in the side of the wrong business, not to mention residing on the wrong landmass; he needs to get over here quick and start pumping out copy for the major news agencies. It's at least as good as anything they put out:

"'I'm not sure where we went wrong,' says Ellen McCormack, nervously fondling the recycled paper cup holding her organic Kona soy latte. 'It seems like only yesterday Rain was a carefree little boy at the Montessori school, playing non-competitive musical chairs with the other children and his care facilitators.

"'But now...' she pauses, staring out the window of her postmodern Palo Alto home. The words are hesitant, measured, bearing a tale of family heartbreak almost too painful for her to recount. 'But now, Rain insists that I call him Bobby Ray.'"

"'During a cross-country trip to New York, he stopped at the Iowa 80 Truck Stop in Walcott, Iowa, and bought a John Deere gimme cap as a gag souvenir,'" says Levin. "'Within a year, he had dropped out of graduate school, abandoned his SoMa apartment, and and was working at a drive-thru liquor store. Today he is a wealthy televangelist in Bossier City, Louisiana.'"

"Mighty quiet out there tonight... Yeah - maybe a little too quiet, you know?"

Here's the latest batch of audio I got out to radio stations in the States on events here in Jerusalem during and after the Arafat funeral. These and other exclusive reports, regularly updated, are available at my beta site - some clips will take a few moments to download and autoplay in a new window):

Public Security, acting Tourism Minister Gideon Ezra on security concerns and tourism, chaotic funeral of PA Chairman Yasser Arafat and future relations with successors.
Security Minister: hopeful about PA

Supt. Gil Klieman on national high security-alert, after interment of Arafat coinciding with end of Ramadan prayers. Florida. Friday, Nov. 12, 2004.
Police spokesman: high terror alert

Latest update on comatose Arafat, plans for funeral, developing Palestinian leadership triumverate. WINK/WNOG Radio, Ft. Myers, Florida. Wednesday, Nov. 10, 2004.
Arafat & the PA: the day after

Segment of a live international report on the US absentee ballot and voters in Israel for WINK/WNOG Radio, Ft. Myers, Florida. Wednesday, Oct, 20 2004.
Elections 2004: US voters in Israel
'Democrats Abroad' Israel branch

Audio: News & Features
Text: News & Features

Archive report: Jerusalem bus No.19 bombing: Eyewitness report

Blogrolling: Keep That Card and Letter Coming In...

Mucho todas to Jewsweek's "The Yada Blog," and "Israellycool," for adding me to their blogroll. Guys, the check is enclosed in the javascript. May you grow and prosper, and your servers ever reign.

And all you other bloggers? Well, do keep that card and letter coming in...

Now why do I suddenly somehow feel like Steve Martin madly waving the telephone book in the air in, "The Jerk?" This is the kind of spontaneous publicity I need! My name in print! That really makes somebody! Things are going to start happening to me now."

And now, back to the news: Yasser Arafat is still seriously dead.


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